Episode 189 - Dick on Whang!

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Justin Whang is in studio, the infamous “C*m Jar”, Crippled Jesus Gets Laid, Trump gets away with it, finding Iran on a map, aid for Australia, Maddox demonstrates how not mad he is, mooncult ends Biden’s presidential run, Kiwi Chris writes a song, parents getting in the way of video games, using your girlfriend as a secretary, porn rage, a ghost HR complaint, black knights, Vox Day, and Mint gets an apology; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Justin Whang! Explaining the Internet so you don't have to. YouTube	Is a Rage! Not a Rage.
Crippled Jesus Very insensitive.	Is a Rage! Not a Rage.
mooncult An exclusive comedy collective. Twitter	Is a Rage! Not a Rage.
Davey Crocko YouTube	Is a Rage! Not a Rage.
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If you look up the definition of “not mad” in the dictionary, this is certainly what you’ll see.

The cocks are emphasized. That is because the subject is definitely not mad, and not affected at all by the sight of well-drawn cocks on their own face. Nor or they affected in any way by the amount of expertise and talented effort that was spent in the goal of making said cocks appear on the face. An amount of effort and discipline that the subject would in fact be unable to identify with, because they do not have it and have no appreciation of it. It is a pearlescent rope before a swine and they wouldn’t even understand the joke or reference in this sentence without the aid of a machine.

Note the over-reliance of buzzword psychology: “psychotic”, “obsessive”, “stalker”. This is how the female communicates with other females. Not in terms of accuracy, but in severity. Specifically the severity of how “not mad” this particular female is. And how “above it” and “over it” they are. It’s the trifecta that’s important. I’m not mad because I’m above it. And I’m above it because I’m over it. And I’m over it because, you guessed it, I’m not mad.

Maddox used to rip into hate mail. Now he just bends over and presents his ass, Tweeting whatever you tell him to. Sad! But first…

It’s time to find Iran on a map. I don’t know why. It seems like if you can find it in real life by pointing in a random direction and going, “way over there”, that should be good enough, but we have an ego problem as well, and pedantism is good for the ego, so that’s what we’re doing.

Some percentage of people can identify Iran on a map. I would be happy if that same percentage could identify a map. And I don’t mean in the Dora the Explorer way, that there is a Mappy right on the screen and that you can scream at it at the top of your lungs until Daddy’s hungover brain is shredded. I mean identifying a map when it’s important to solving the problem.

We have a student loan problem. We have a male toxicity problem. We have a white Oscars problem. We have a suicide problem. We have a drugs problem–not enough of them. We have a homeless problem. People are stealing their dogs. We have a problem lying about the natural state of things. We have an ego problem. Can you find the solution on this map?

mooncult’s Biden clip. It’s got over two million views. Why not one more?

Biden proclaims the 'European' identity of America: "Our culture is not imported from some African nation." pic.twitter.com/mG1ys8fzWB

— ᏔმƦ𝔢ჳ💤 (@mooncult) January 2, 2020