Episode 209 – Dick on the LA Riots


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My coverage on the street of the LA riots, giving Sean smooches, a failure to launch, Johnny and Coach in studio, an argument with Null about CDA 230 protections, Nick Rekieta’s 3PM breakfast, a guy pretending to be a girl on OnlyFans, a guy whose wife was pulling in 9k on OnlyFans, death by self-driving car, and first-hand Antifa antics; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Nick Rekieta
Lawyer and Dickhead Nick Rekieta breaks down Maddox's lolsuit, Patreon.
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Null
Owner/Admin of Kiwi Farms, Former 8chan dev, Advocate of not fucking up.
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Not a Rage.
Vito
A typical neckbeard. The guy who vaped Belle Delphine's bathwater.
Is a Rage!

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Gator
Kremlin's favorite Kremling. Soundboard aficionado. Co-host of The Ralph Retort. Twitter.
Is a Rage!

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Oxmad is here to stay! And I couldn’t be happier. I believe Ox Mad the Cowboy is an alter-ego Maddox has invented to cope with the finality of his failures and speak honestly on the never-ending questions about me, his past choices, and the continued insanity of trying to make it in Hollywood as a 42-year-old man with no prospects, failing health, and a non-existent fan base. And I couldn’t be happier! In this month’s bonus episode, we watch choice highlights from Ox Mad’s Twitch streams, including a story of the first time Maddox went to a water park, which was a year and a half ago. Enjoy!

But first…

People look for meaning in a riot. There is none. It’s a walking, talking, brick-tossing contradiction of human emotions and resentments that have built up over hundreds of years, blowing off gore and authority like a super caldera every twenty or so. It’s an anniversary fight. The one you don’t talk about the next day because it’s too ugly to walk back, but goddamn was it fun to say! And anyway, you get it. You both get it.

I think it’s possible to support both protesters and the police. Because they are both simultaneously peaceful wardens of life and authoritarian thugs seeking to subjugate through violence and the threat of it. They gnaw at our rights constantly, chewing through your fucking skull every day and in every way, controlling our vices and language and speech on both sides, making us constantly submit to their bullshit. Go for it, guys! Bring your A games and your bricks and your batons and have at it! We’ll be on hand to lick the boot of the winner no matter who it is.

Inarguably riots are an effective marketing vehicle. But this will be argued and I can’t understand why. Maybe it’s not the effectiveness people question, but the message, they are just phrasing it wrong.

The downtrodden are victims of the establishment and the establishment exists to protect us from them. White privilege exists and it means defiance in the face of mathematics. These simple things will evoke feelings of resentment and fury. You print six trillion dollars and you kill the people. You print $20 and The People kill you. Mobs of the impoverished and the discontented and Les Misérables seek to destroy their own community, routing their own sickness from the face of the Earth and they are right to do so, but euthanasia is illegal. Suicide is forbidden, so we reject their autonomy in this matter on principle. You will sit in the ghetto, and you will like it!

I think education is the answer. I would say religion is the answer, but these motherfuckers burned down a church, so we need to adapt. Education, education, education. Huge ivory towers of learninnation to replace the burnination. That’s what the inner city needs. If only they had voted for Bernie! Oh God, why don’t they understand that a liberal arts degree and a lifetime of debt are so much more fulfilling than free liquor and shoes. Condescension is a learned vice and we must indoctrinate them to them. Only in unthinking reality itself will they learn that violence is not the answer. The willingness to defy mathematics. That is white privilege. We can teach it!

The Fed could have printed us out of this riot. But fuck em. The 1% already got theirs. Insurance won’t cover any of the carnage because Warren Buffet doesn’t want to. The government killed more small businesses over the meme flu than the rioters every could, and even in the face of weaponized boredom, the lockdown continues.

The police exist to protect us from our imaginations, and you don’t have to imagine a mob. They’re right there in front of you at the front gates hundreds of miles away. Fuck em.

Here is:
My live riot coverage on the Killstream
Vito’s live coverage on YouTube

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Author: Dick Masterson

Host of The Dick Show.