Episode 212 – Dick on Plantation Simulator


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A week of LA Killstreams, Sophia Narwitz on the Minneapolis riots, Jesse Lee Peterson offers to marry me, back to Pilates, how fat women got on lockdown, throwing my neck out looking at boobs, Plantation Simulator, Tommy Tallarico and the Earthworm Jim Amico, the Macy’s beatdown, statues getting ripped down, The Last of Us: Part 2, twin trouble, girls who want to see other people and think about themselves, and how to celebrate Father’s Day; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

My Dad
Wants a turn table.
Religion
Is a Rage!

Not a Rage.
Sophia Narwitz
Senior Editor/social media @rt_com. YouTube
Is a Rage!

Not a Rage.
Ethan Ralph
Host of The Killstream. Owner/Editor-in-Chief of The Ralph Retort. Twitter. DLive.
Is a Rage!

Not a Rage.
Tommy Tallarico
President/CEO of Intellivision
Is a Rage!

Not a Rage.
See All Co-Hosts

What a week! Me and Destiny vs. Nick Fuentes and Ralph, Jesse Lee Peterson offers to marry me and 80s Girl in his church, Chaggot destroys a coaster, you can see all these events in full color and in high-fidelity audio over at the killstream.live (I think). Check it out now, or take your time because honestly, it would be hard to top, and thank you to Ethan Ralph and the rest of the Killstream Knockout Krew for making it all possible!

Also, check out The Dick Show on SubscribeStar if you want access to bonus content and video, but you don’t want to support Patreon. I’ll get into it more next week, but the TL;DR version of it goes thusly: you can’t fight MasterCard. And the only ones who can help us now, are the Federal Reserve. Crypto will not, and anyone who says otherwise is no fun at parties. But first…

History is being torn down and re-written by victorious mobs, desperate and famous men are preying on whores–and they are very sorry about it, an invisible enemy virus looms on the horizon ready to kill the decrepit if they don’t wash their hands–and they won’t. The n-word abounds, Donald Trump can’t drink water, dogs and thots are living together…mass hysteria.

What better time to kick back and distract yourself with a first-of-its-kind, fully immersive, multiplayer online video game experience. Plantation Simulator. The first game in history where the bad guy is you. And I don’t mean an avatar within the game, but actually you. Brought to you by Sid Meier and Jesse Lee Peterson, Plantation Simulator is a realtime guilt-based strategy game that unlocks the true power of the art form.

Chose your race. That was the wrong choice and you should feel bad about yourself. Choose your background. That was the wrong choice and you should feel bad about yourself. Choose your destiny in this historically accurate version of the Antebellum South. Will you thread the needle between compassion and self-preservation in this cutthroat world of industrialization? How much of your current life will you sacrifice to ease the suffering of others? Would you like to donate $1 to stop hunger? That was the wrong choice and you should feel bad about yourself.

And using your magical time portal, you can watch future history be re-written as you navigate the morally-ambivalent quagmire of usury, betrayal, and predation that is and was slavery. Will NASCAR ban confederate flags? Does some fucking celebrity have an opinion about you? Does a bear shit in a Chinese iPhone factory? The future is up to you!

You get it. No one really cares about the n-word. And its origins and any inherent meaning it might have once had has been lost to time. No one cares about whores cock-teasing celebrities. It’s a weapon white people use against one another to destroy their lives. And the labor and suffering of the victims gain nothing from it. We used to have a word for that, but it was similarly lost to time.

Dick Pics

An absolutely vile thumbnail by Berries and Cream.

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Author: Dick Masterson

Host of The Dick Show.