Episode 248 – Dick on The Uniparty

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Crippled Jesus is guilty on all counts, blue collar witch hunts, the green flash is a myth, white math, Mx. Potato Head, ruining your wife’s conspiracy theories, having an honest conversation about the p*ssy, my girlfriend believes in a different God, Cialis chasers, stubby pencils, and showing my dog on camera; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Crippled Jesus
Very insensitive.
Is a Rage!

Not a Rage.
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A new bonus episode is up! Join me and Sean and the various doxes as we present Mr. Genderless Potato Head, Dad swapping, homeless coin, normalizing making it rain, Madonna vs. The Patriarchy, Newport Beach, peeing in the shower for comedy, bombing Syria, the COVID Olympics, ghosting, women flaking escrow, and Oxmad’s panties; at patreon.com/TheDickShow.

And then we got a bunch more bonus content coming this month, but first…

The Uniparty is back in town, ladies and gentlemen! And it’s just in the nick of time. You don’t want your corporate techno fascism to outpace your bureaucratic police fascism by too much. You’ll forget what it’s like to be human. The boot in the back of your neck is there to remind you. I submit, therefore I am.

Your corporate techno fascism and your bureaucratic police fascism need to be finely balanced, along with your medical financial fascism and your coerced utility fascism. The 9-5 schedule and commercial real estate prison you will soon be able to resume surviving and thriving within are there to remind you of this. Survive by choice. Choose to work. It’s not about the money. It’s never about the money.

Morality will be dictated to you by a series of experiences that are not shared. They are fabricated. This is hypno memory fascism. Heroism. Sacrifice. Hard work. This is to remind you that none of these things are important. Everyone is in on the joke.

A vaccination freedom card will be sent to your domestic fascism coordinator. If you do not have a domestic fascism coordinator, one will be assigned to you by a complex of some sort. She will remind you that you have a dick you’re not allowed to use. She will be too fat and angrier than you somehow. These are the choices you made!

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