Episode 279 – Dick on Swallowing Hair

Download the MP3 | Watch the Video | SubscribeStar

Dave Chapelle is canceled, a self-defense school shooting, “Fat Watch” with Tess Holiday, Adam from Houston has fun with a speculum, a never-ending state of un-safety, swallowing hair, whistleblowing, carbon-saving driving directions, and electroshocking your brain to cure depression from being fat; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Adam from Houston Is a Rage!

Not a Rage.
See All Co-Hosts

Unbelievable! There’s a new episode of “The Biggest Problem in the Universe” out now and wouldn’t you believe it, the Biggest Problem Patreon is almost up to $2,000. It looks like Vito severely underestimated the worth of this show and will soon be forced to do it every week! Unbelievable! Make sure you go vote on this week’s problems: Installing Console Games, Waiters Who Don’t Write Down Your Order, Master Erasure, and Columbus Hate. But first…

The most aggrieved class of person in the world is the worried white woman. Worn down to the bone with worry. Exhausted from sleepless nights. Haunted by thoughts of hate jokes and rape speech and the anti-love equation. Sexual dancing. Flabby arms. Terrified beyond rational thought about the suffering of the less fortunate–and they are all less fortunate than she. Angry and righteous at the thought of injustice and mis-justice and Dave Justice. Scored and annoyed and bitter at her lack of voice, and the men who have ignored her brilliant thoughts of contributions and all the hundreds of billions of years of women that have come before her, and most of all, seething that she might or may not be accepted for her massive dick.

These are the daily trials and tribulations of white women all over the universe. And today, it’s Dave Chappelle’s fault!

No! It’s your fault too. And my fault. Oh dear God, it’s His fault too.

There is a sub class of a sub class of a sub class of white men out there who will one day pay for all their suffering that they did cause. The Anti-Christ they called him in the beginning. A being of pure hatred who walks the Earth. Born to a white family in a white house and fed white milk, only the most female of women could ever hope to defeat him.

Our savior will be born from a holy trans-union, will drink not but chest milk and feed but not from furry father mother. And they will identify as such. Chris the Redeemer will know the enemy because they will be the enemy. The great white hope, the true white woman.

And she will save you and destroy you. And you’ll be happy.

Thumbnail to start HeHeSilly Thumbnail Season by HeHeSilly.