Episode 299 – Dick on Road Rage: Los Angeles 2



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Nick Rekieta in studio, Road Rage: Los Angeles 2, Hitomi Tanaka’s final movie, a mom kills her son on television, a man girdle, banned from the paralympics, LARPing mercinaries, fatphobia and white supremacy, hot potatoe nuclear reactor, Vito attacks Putin, and Maddox’s funeral; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Nick Rekieta
Lawyer and Dickhead Nick Rekieta breaks down Maddox's lolsuit, Patreon.
Is a Rage!

Not a Rage.
Vito
A typical neckbeard. The guy who vaped Belle Delphine's bathwater.
Is a Rage!

Not a Rage.
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Road Rage: Los Angeles 2/Maddox’s Funeral/The 300 is over, but it’s not over yet! Because the show hasn’t been posted yet. And you know what that means…anything can happen! When it is posted–unless it’s lost in a cab or a strip club or a luggage check or an AirBnb bathroom or a plague of locusts, it will be at Patreon.com/TheDickShow, alongside our recent bonus episode and a commentary track Nick Rekieta and I did for “Starship Troopers”. Pre-subscribe. You get the notification. It’s easier to do it that way, trust me! But first…

Gas in en route to hit $10/gallon. I don’t know what that means for the $15 minimum wage or canceling all of student debt or getting some police reform or getting women in STEM or fighting global warming or combating white supremacists at home and hate speech and fat speech and no speech, silence is violence, but least I know I’m doing my part. Are you?

I’m paying $200 a week in gas to commute 5 hours a week in life to inflate commercial real estate prices a week to make $400 a week to pay $50 a week in healthcare for a healthy person in my 20s and 30s who never needs to go to the doctor, and $30 in student loans for my degree in business ethics–BUSINESS ETHICS–and $200 a week in my Blackrock subsidized rent package and $100 a week in Kitchen United slop delivered to my door by myself and $5 a week in toothpaste–might have to nix that one–and a cell phone and oh shit I wrecked my car. Do I need a car anymore? Do I need a job? Do I need to live?

You’ll own nothing because houses are being reverse mortgaged to banks and investment companies by Boomers who were in on the ground floor of the Ponzi scheme and want to travel the world now making Cialis commercials until they’re dead. When gas is $12 a gallon because of Russia–BECAUSE OF RUSSIA–there’s no point in owning a car. Just rent one by the hour. Just stay at home.

Happiness is the default setting for the enslaved. North Koreans weeping in unadulterated joy at the suggestion of their God-king. Slave songs, church hymnals. Worship of joy and relief at the feeling of complete and utter destruction. Happiness is a sickness and a coping strategy for enslavement. You will own nothing. And you will be happy. You’ll be fucking thrilled.

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Author: Dick Masterson

Host of The Dick Show.